Thursday, October 29, 2009

Palin's "Undead" Political Career Has Malek Looking For Clues

I will be taking a break from blogging for a while for very happy personal reasons, and I've got to say, it couldn't happen at a better time.  Every single day lately the news about Palin must look more horrific from the viewpoint of her Klassless Kooky Klan.

In a playful mood the other night I posted a comment on Fred Malek's blog asking him what he thought about Palin's predilection for 3rd parties. Now I can't presume Mr. Malek took notice of my question, but nevertheless his next post pretty much answered my query.  Malek just posted his "Top 10 Republican Leaders Who Could Be President" and Palin is nowhere to be seen from 1 to 10.

GOP "Kingmaker" Fred Malek knows a dark horse when he sees one, and he also knows when to stop flogging a dead one.  He still gives an obligatory nod to Caribou Barbie in his list of influential Republicans, "...Romney, Pawlenty, Barbour, McConnell, Boehner, Gingrich, Palin, and others."

Palin, and others.

Women that Malek places ahead of Palin on a list of GOPers who "Could Be President" include Meg Whitman, who he says "has a long road ahead", and Kelly Ayotte - "The young and proven Attorney General of New Hampshire is poised to win this Senate seat next year. She has the friendly and reasonable comportment of an Olympia Snowe or Susan Collins but is more center right in her philosophy and thus better positioned for future leadership."

Young.  PROVEN.    Reasonable comportment.  Center right in her philosophy.  Future leadership.  

As we all know so well, not one of those words describe Bad Sarah. And the unspoken criticism is there - Ayotte is a woman who has held and kept a responsible position.  Ahhh, back at the AK pad this has got to be stinging the papery thin-skinned One and her Stapletongued sidekick.  Palin's only DC ally - aside from mad-Scientologist Coale - looks forward to reasonable leadership in the GOP, much like reasonable people from both parties do. There is no place for Palin on his list.

Palin fills a space at the bottom of the post along with a couple of other flops - a no-name-recognition diplomat in Singapore and Marco Rubio who is poised to lose in a Senate race against Crist in Florida.  Here Malek describes the GOP Goodtime Girl as "charismatic", "effective" and someone he "likes a lot." And apparently someone who is so out of touch that he will be perusing her book for "some clues" as to what the heck is going through that "effective" little head of hers.  Malek has telegraphed his meaning very well.  Palin is as much of a strange brew to him, long time GOP insider, as she is to the rest of us. 

Palin's flamed-out comet is becoming just a memory of a bad omen. 

Here's a final likely denouement for Palin's vampiric political career - a career that is already dead, but lives on "undead" in the minds of fantasists, extremists and C4P creepy cringers.  Already forced to dwell in a self-imposed political twilight half-life of Facebook posts and carefully orchestrated appearances, Palin's thinly shrouded and monsterous personal and financial scandals must vigilantly be kept from exposure to the light of day.

Her dwindling faithful may not question her, Team Sarah is melting into the floor, her few close associates are either falling away or considered "muzzled" and "leashed".  She can only hope to live on as a sort of "immortal" in the minds of her cultish clique, whose cash she regularly feeds on through her ungodly speaking fees, corrupt PAC and AK Trust, and pre-orders for propped up book sales.

Palin's ghastly personal scandals could very well finish her off quite soon.  There is a hunter in her woods, and he's got a silver bullet with her name on it.  Palin's phantom hopes are to vegetate in this undead fashion until the US Presidential primaries give her one last stand - a chance for drawing the last precious monies from her charismatic cult.

The spotlight clearly isn't as appealing anymore, as any focused attention could result in a slip or exposure, a release of the bats, the inner demons, the lie that unravels the tattered web.  And yet Palin's Boogeyman will always be the media she despises, who will cover her whether she gets plastic surgery, fights with Levi, or stages a run in Iowa.  These days she prefers the shadows.

If Palin somehow makes it to 2012 without a humiliating exposure, her inevitable defeats in a few primary races will decisively drive the stake through her corpselike political career, finally ending one of the downright spookiest public tales in the history of our country.

On that scary note - I wish everyone out there a delicious and fun-loving Halloween.  BOO!

UPDATE:  Of course everyone is giving thanks to S-error P for once again "Snatching Defeat From the Jaws of Victory" as her hotly backed radical right wing candidate Hoffman lost a New York Congressional seat that has been held by the GOP for over 150 years to a moderate Democrat. For this we liberals heartily give "thanks" to Palin for wielding her anti-matter political clout in reverse as usual, and firmly consolidating her pariah status with the GOP - the party that last night won Governorships in New Jersey and Virginia with candidates that specifically asked Bad Sarah to stay away, please.  (With her usual bad manners Palin actually ran uninvited and possibly illegal robocalls at the last minute in Virginia, no doubt in order to be able to claim some influence in a race that had the winner with a double digit lead two weeks before election night.)  Finally, liberals across the land will also find themselves folding hands in thanksgiving to John McCain, who has anti-heroically managed to unleash the best weapon against the GOP that America has ever seen.

Next the spotlights will shine on Bad Sarah as she boogies with the media to flog her ghostwritten memoir beyond her shrinking sub-base of avid Facebook readers.  Oprah first, then Barbara Walters and a self important march across the land to visit her favorite rabid right conservative holier-than-thou radio and TV hosts that will ask her only fawning and adoring pre-arranged questions, plus stops at air force bases and conservative towns via bus. This will no doubt give the comedians and the rest of us a jolly holiday season filled with gaffes, La Palin word salads, dish on family scandals, and a hissing cameo appearance from Meghan "Scrooge" Stapletongue.  Palin's hasty-pudding of a book is already competing with several other tell-alls and is starting to be a hard sell, even to conservatives. FreedomWorks is now advertising the Newsmax pre-holiday price of "Going Rogue" of "Just $4.97, Best Price in the World".

$4.97 sounds like a lot for a pack of lies, refrigerator magnet wisdom and painfully extended basketball metaphors, but after all it is probably a sort of bargain.  Palin's version of events will to some degree be nailed down in writing, and any subsequent scandals that emerge will show her vividly for the purveyor of falsehoods that she is.  First the 2008 Presidential election, next the splintering of the GOP, and now the superpower to get Republican moderates voting Democratic when she weighs in on local elections.  For liberals in America, Palin truly is the gift that just keeps on giving.


Anonymous said...

"There is a hunter in her woods, and he's got a silver bullet with her name on it."

Indeed and so very true.

Anonymous said...

Enjoy your break, Helen.

CindyL said...

Well done and right on time. Pass the candy popcorn!

ManxMamma said...

Have a happy, wonderful time away.

jEDI said...

Guess the nailin of the Palin coffin is at hand at last


Floyd M. Orr said...

Excellent allegory, Helen! I certainly hope you are right about that silver bullet, although I think it is the light of day, not a bullet, that will do her in, as it should any vampire. Please do not confuse her with a werewolf. She would murder their pups just for the fun of it!

Anonymous said...

mmmmmmmmmmm delicious politics

Anonymous said...

Why don't you talk about all the good things Sarah Palin has done for her state and country? How can you possibly think like such a negative?

Anonymous said...

@5:39 - why don't you go start your own blog and stop criticizing others? Talk about negativity! From your writing style above, I'm sure readers will flock to it.

KaJo said...

"Why don't you talk about all the good things Sarah Palin has done for her state and country?"

Because the only things anyone can find that fit that criteria are things Palin herself has SAID she's done.

That's a problem. When any fact-checking follows, it turns out Palin has taken credit for others' work, or had outright lied.

peacetown said...

Palin is a joke. We all know that. So why do we all keep taking her seriously? Sometimes I think her detractors take her more seriously than her supporters. My mind boggles, then I just shut down.

SoCalWolfGal said...

Helen, Floyd M. Orr is right on the money; this was a beautifully written allegory on no doubt what will go down in the history books as one of the weirdest forays into politics this country has ever seen. Or likely to see, hopefully. Enjoy your time away.

Anonymous said...

We have a festive holiday coming up, so we should get in a holiday mood by following anon 5:39's advice. I encourage everyone to write in with something good that Sarah Palin has done. It doesn't even have to be for Alaska, it could be for the United States or all mankind. I'll even start with a few examples of wonderful things that Sarah Palin has done:

1. She quit her job as governor of Alaska.

2. She helped elect Barack Obama.

3. When she endorsed the Conservative Independent candidate in the NY congressional race, instead of the GOP guy, Democrats are using Sarah to boost their chances for a win-- and to increase their fund raising. Sarah is the gift that keeps on giving.

4. Sarah has brought together people from all parts of the world who have never met each other. But, because they share a common belief that Sarah was totally unqualified for any national office, they continue to meet daily and exchange humor, information, insights and friendship. Thanks, Helen, I found your blog because of Sarah!

Helen said...

Ha ha Anon 2:27 Well done!

And thanks to all the well wishers
: )

Anonymous said...

More good things that Sarah Palin has done:

Thanks to Sarah (and other right wing wingnuts), the GOP has lost its moderate voters and are left with conservative and very conservative members fighting among themselves.

Thanks to Sarah, Levi Johnston has new found money, new found career(s), and many new found friends.

The Wall Street Journal reported that Oprah's ratings have been steadily dropping, but thanks to Sarah, Oprah will soon get a ratings bump.

The writers on the David Letterman show (along with other TV comedy outlets) have been looking for comic material ever since Bush left office. For the first few weeks of the Obama administration, a Letterman writer would joke that he still had nothing funny to make a joke about. But, thanks to Sarah, they all have wonderful, endless comedy material to keep us laughing.

Thanks to Sarah Palin, another Emmy for Tina Fey!

Anonymous said...

Ding Dong the Witch is Dead!!!!!

Echoing throughout Alaska this halloween.....


Ransom said...

I think you hit it. Tonight Palin helped get a Dem elected to a seat held by the GOP for 150 years! She might well be the most UNPOPULAR conservative on record.

Anonymous said...

It looks like Palin's political star, or burned out comet, has imploded. No need to stop being vigilant, but perhaps during the holidays this year we can drop the super vigilance regarding the state of the nation and just worry about the usual crowds, shopping, budgets, family visits and traveling.

Anonymous said...

Still missing you, Helen, but glad to find you on other sites, posting!

Your Uncle Fester photo treatment of Joe the Plumber, married to the recent 'wigged out' hair of Palin on Oprah, plays silly buggers with my mind. . .

I'm just imagining Palin with her fakey hair over her eyes, famous glasses stuck through the mess, shuffling around in her uncomfortable Naughty Monkey Shoes. . .yes, you guessed it.

"Cousin It."

And the disembodied 'hand' that writes the Facebook blog???


I'm not waiting for your Adam's Family/Munsters send up of Palin, Todd and Assorteds. . .I'm just savoring it in my own mind.

All by my own bad self.

Anonymous said...

"Why don't you talk about all the good things Sarah Palin has done for her state and country?"

Sarah promised ethics reform in AK. The best thing she did for ethics reform in AK was to resign.